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Author Topic: RIP IT APART  (Read 1205 times)

Offline Greek

RIP IT APART
«: July 06, 2009, 12:43:05 PM»
I may not update as sooon, cuz my tablet is about to break =(, however, plz rip it apart.

No flames, but harsh crits are accepted!



http://sepapa-san.deviantart.com/art/Satyr-Remake-lineart-128194835

 
        

Offline MT

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Re: RIP IT APART
«Reply #1: July 06, 2009, 01:34:23 PM»
hmm, i'm not very good with crits but one thing that really caught my eye was that the torso is WAY too big compared to the rest of her body.

Offline Creek

Re: RIP IT APART
«Reply #2: July 06, 2009, 02:16:03 PM»
hmm, i'm not very good with crits but one thing that really caught my eye was that the torso is WAY too big compared to the rest of her body.

Yeah, even for a satyr, their bodies are pretty well balanced. The torso should be either the same length as the legs, or a tiny [see that, tiny] bit longer. That torso is way to large for the legs, and creates an unbalanced, unstable look to the figure :3

Offline Suzy

Re: RIP IT APART
«Reply #3: July 06, 2009, 02:23:37 PM»
A length that I have noticed for torso length is about 2 heads. Rather, doubling the heighth of the head should just about equal the length of the torso. This, of course, varies. </twocents>

Offline Greek

Re: RIP IT APART
«Reply #4: July 06, 2009, 02:36:11 PM»
-- ill make more edits-- =)
« Last Edit: July 06, 2009, 03:05:07 PM by Greek »

IPGD

Re: RIP IT APART
«Reply #5: July 06, 2009, 02:39:27 PM»

Superimpose over the original at your own leisure. The BIG UNNECESSARY DO NOT STEAL TEXT makes posting the overlay impractical

Key points:

  • Incredibly bland expression. I'd expect to see that face on someone's driver's license, not while they're dancing. DID NOT FEEL LIKE DRAWING HAIR OR HORNS BECAUSE I DONT HAVE TO!!!
  • Neck-shoulder area is big mess. The collarbone is not as pronounced as you think it is; unless you are frighteningly skinny, you won't even see it in most poses. When the arm is lifted, it recedes almost completely behind the shoulder and armpit muscle.
  • When defining the neck, draw the two neck muscles that run from the back of the ear to the collarbone. These muscles tend to be pretty crucial for setting out the shape of the neck. Everything between those two muscles and the shoulders is typically the trapezius.
  • More tension in the arm and hand. I'm not a professional dancer or anything (I can't even do DDR), but most motions made in a dance tend to be pretty pointed. A flappy arm flailing about probably isn't what you want.
  • While the top of the breast does anchor into the pectoral armpit muscle, the bottom of the breast will edge under the armpit. You don't have to center them that much (though the left breast is probably a little too off center in my redline).
  • Torso is pretty formless. I can't tell what construction shapes you used since this is finished lineart, but work on that. See the book recommendations in my sig for anatomy help (principally Loomis, Bridgman and Hogarth).
  • The vagina does not go on the stomach. When the leg is raised, you won't even be able to see it.
  • Her back foot is... on backwards. I made some other minor changes to the legs as well, but take them with a grain of salt because I know nothing about digitigrade anatomy. i think it would benefit if you'd point the front toes down a little more, though, to give her more of a prancing look.

Quote
A length that I have noticed for torso length is about 2 heads. Rather, doubling the heighth of the head should just about equal the length of the torso. This, of course, varies.

Head proportions:

0-1: Top of head to chin
1-2: Chin to nipples on a flat chest
2-3: Nipples to navel
3-4: Navel to crotch
4-5: Crotch to mid thigh
5-6: Mid thigh to bottom of knee
6-7: Bottom of knee to midway between bottom of knee and bottom of the foot
7-8: Knee-foot midpoint to bottom of foot

research this stuff before you say it, brohime!

Offline Greek

Re: RIP IT APART
«Reply #6: July 06, 2009, 02:56:37 PM»
wow thanks!! =). I didn't know I had a lot of stuff wrong, also I think your right, before I made changes , the back foot was to the side.....
« Last Edit: July 06, 2009, 03:03:53 PM by Greek »